POOP or POTATO?
09 May 2011
Fluctuations
So today I had some Euros I wanted to get change for. I thought it'd be pretty cool to get them in American dollars because I am, in America, after all. So there was this Asian lady in front of me and she was causing a riot.
Asian Lady: Why it change? Yesterday I get two hunat dolla pho yen, today I get one hunat eighty dolla pho yen. Why it change?
American: (shrugged his shoulders) idk Ma'am, Fluctuations?
Asian Lady: O: FLUC YOU WHITE PEOPLE TOO!!
Get it? Teehee!
08 May 2011
Pillsbury Doughboy
One day, I decided to visit the Pillsbury Dough Company. With a surprise I saw Pillsbury Doughboy. As a little kid, I loved Doughboy, I thought Doughboy was freakin' amazing. Unfortunately, today, my thoughts for him changed. I saw Pillsbury Doughboy bending down to pick up dough off the floor and to my surprise, I saw his "dough-nuts" -_-
Get it? Teehee!
07 May 2011
Dumb Jose (Part 2)
One day Jose and his friend were walking to the park. His friend stepped on something squishy. As dumb as it sounds, his friend decided to sniff his shoe to figure out what it was that he stepped on.
Friend: hmmmm, smells like chocolate!
Jose, got jealous and wished he had been the one that stepped on chocolate.
The next day Jose and his friend walked to the park again and Jose was hoping he'd step on chocolate. Amazingly, Jose stepped on something squishy, and surprisingly, it was the same thing his friend had stepped on earlier. Jose takes off his shoe excitedly and smelled his shoe..
Jose: (with a disgusted face) What the heck?! This is not chocolate!!
Get it? Teehee!
06 May 2011
Dumb Jose!
One day at a fair, Jose and his friend played a game. Surprisingly Jose won and claimed a toilet brush as his prize.
The Next day Jose the boy meets up with his friend.
Friend: How was the toilet brush?
Jose: Toilet paper is better.
Get it? Teehee!
05 May 2011
Fat Guy with Women's Trend?
One day, a 5 year old boy walked into his mom's room.
Boy: Mom, what are you doing?
Mom: Well son, I'm getting ready for the flood.
Boy: Whats the flood?
Mom: It's when I need to sit on a "boat" because I don't want the back of my pants to be wet.
Boy: Well, Mom, can I have a "boat", I don't want the back of my pants to get wet.
Mom: Son, the flood only attacks the girls, it doesn't attack boys sweetheart.
Later that day the Boy and the Mom were at a buffet.
Boy: Mom, I thought the flood only attacked girls?
Mom: It does, it never attacks boys.
Boy: Then mom, how come that fat guy got attacked by the flood? (Points at a fat guy's wet butt as he ran to the bathroom)
Get it? Teehee!
04 May 2011
Priest Looking for his Bird
There was a black priest preaching. Apparently he was looking for his lost bird.
Priest: anyone got bird?
All the men stood up.
Priest: I meant to say, anyone seen a bird?
All the women stood up.
Priest: Ahh, I meant to say, Anyone seen my bird?
A gay guy stood up smiling.
Get it? Teehee!
03 May 2011
Small Things!
Wife: Hun, can you buy me a new bra?
Husband: Babe, just dont wear a bra, your boobs are so small anyway
Wife: Then why do you wear briefs?
Get it? Teehee!
02 May 2011
Suhkdeep and His Friend
One Summer day, two Indians visited Caesar's Palace. Their names were Suhkdeep and Hardyk. They strolled around the hotel until Hardyk disappeared from Suhkdeep's sight. Suhkdeep went around the hotel lobby looking for his friend. Suhkdeep then stumbled upon a black person that did room service. Apparently the guy was homosexual.
Suhkdeep (to guy): Me Suhkdeep, me looking for Hardyk.
Black guy: (With a manly voice) Ohhhhh, Follow me..
Suhkdeep followed the black guy and ended up finding something else..
Get it? Teehee!
01 May 2011
Liver and Cheese
One night at the bar, there were three guys, a Black, a White, and a Filipino. A Hot Sizzling Chick goes up to the bartender and the three guys sees her simultaneously. They all approached the chick and wanted to get hooked up.
Chick: Whoah whoah whoah, hold on a minute, lets make this a little interesting.
All 3 guys: Okay!
Chick: Since I love "liver" and "cheese" so much, I want each of you to use it in a sentence.
Black: I LOVE "liver" and "cheese" too! (smiling)
Chick: Ehhh, anyone else?
White: I HATE "liver" and "cheese"! (disgusted)
Chick: I like the confidence, but ehh.
Filipino: Oh my goodness, guys guys, "liver" alone, "cheese" mine!
And the chick walked away with the Filipino that night.
Get it? Teehee!
